An Amazing Video!!

This video blows my mind. It could have been written by us!! It is our journey, too...

http://www.vocalicious.com/empty_arms/empty_arms_mod.html

An Amazing Summer!!

What a total blessing this summer has been!!! I have worked on myself harder than I have in years. I have started a VERY successful work out plan. I feel so much better about where I am headed. I have laid out tons and soaked up lots of sun. It has been a relaxing and wonderful summer.

Big changes are happening in the Nabors' household. We have decided to quit the infertility race and begin the adoption process. We both want to adopt a precious little girl from China...so, we are starting the ball rolling on that dream. We are SO excited!! I can not wait. We know we are going to name her Maggie. Which is short for Margaret (my grandmother's name), and 'my aggie'! What a blessing!

Just typing this blog to announce our adoption decision makes me overjoyed. We have not given up on having children of our own, but we aren't going to focus on it right now. I am going to stop the medications and give my body a rest and continue to work out. Then we will see what God does with the future.

A Closed Door

Well, my dr. visit this morning closed a door that I was sure we were about to walk through. I met with a very kind dr. who gently told me that even though I am completely healthy, I am too heavy for them to help me with my infertilty issues. I am so sad and humbled.

Holy and Most Precious Father,
Only you know where this road will lead. Father, how do I continue to go on? Oh, preciuos Father, I want to raise your child!! I want to be a mother to one of your precious little souls. I don't even have to have more...just one. Why is it, Lord, that so many people can easily get pregnant (even those who don't want babies), and I can't. Oh, sweet Father, hold my broken heart and help me to find joy. I need joy, Lord. I need you, Lord! Oh, how I love you so!

Amen!

A New Chapter!

Well, Monday at 7 am I am going to a infertility specialist. Dr. Wilson referred me to Dr. Doody. I am excited, but extremely nervous. I have no idea how we are going to finance this, but I am praying that my insurance will cover more than I am thinking. I know we will have some out of pocket costs, but I know it is so worth it.

Please continue to pray that God's hand will guide us, and that we will not be following our own selfish desires.

The Wait is On!!!

Holy and Most Precious Lord,
As I enter this two week wait, please give me the peace of mind that I am in your hands. This body is in your hand. I long to spend time in your presence and know that your plan is perfect and no matter what we do...it is up to you. I thank you that you have a plan. I thank you that when it is time, we will be able to raise your child to love and honor you. What a joy that will be!!!

Hold me, Lord! I need you!
Amen!


Well, as you can see from my heart cry, I have ovulated yet again (Praise God!) on the clomid. I am so thankful that the meds are working and making my body respond correctly. However, the two weeks that I have to wait to test almost drive me crazy. The rest of the time, I am doing something...taking meds...eating/drinking more soy..etc... In the tww, it is just a time of wait. It is a blessing. BUT it is also a time of wonder, questions, doubts, etc. If you are praying for Baby Nabors, please pray for his/her mom and dad during the next two weeks. I want to be full of scripture and prayer instead of wonder and doubt.

All Clear!!

I had my HSG test done yesterday. Let me say, the actual process wasn't so bad...just mild pinching. However, is has been almost 24 hours later and I am still having severe cramping. I feel like I have done a thousand crunches. However, I don't get the effect of 1000 crunches. LOL!!

Anyway, the test went great. My tubes are open and ready for an egg to travel down them. The Radiologist let me look at it. It was very interesting. Praises to God!!! I am so thankful!!

So, we are going to try clomid for a few more months, and then Dr. Wilson is going to send me to a specialist if I am not pregnant yet.

Thanks for the prayers and well wishes. I am blessed to know that my tubes are okay. Even through the pain that I am feeling now...I can feel God's power and grace flowing down on me!!

Praises!! Praises!! Praises!!

I went to see Dr. Wilson yesterday, and he is such a blessing. He is so positive and encouraging. It is awesome to go to a Doctor who knows God's amazing powers.

The next step: We are going to do HSG Test to make sure that I don't have blocked tubes. I am a little nervous about the procedure, but I am excited to make sure that everything is flowing okay. I am hopeful that there is a chance that we will be blessed with a baby.

I am having my HSG test on Tuesday, May 2nd at 8:00 am. I am a little nervous now. Lord, please give me some peace about this procedure. Please allow my tubes to be fully open and ready for the egg to pass through. I pray that this test will be a breeze, and that I will be fully functional.

All Will Be Well

"He helps us to go to sleep at night with a stronger sense of the power of good & an understanding that He is protecting us from evil. He hasn't assured us that we will always get our way; He has promised that He is the WAY. And in His way, despite our suffering, we can safely trust that all will be well. " -Nichole Johnson

All will be well! All will be well! I cling to that today. I am starting my 5th round of Clomid. I can't believe that I have been on this medicine for 5 months already. I am so thankful that it is helping my body work correctly. However, it does get so tiring to have to always be thinking about what you are taking and how much and when, etc.... However, despite all of my suffering and longing, I can trust that all will be well.

I may never hold a child born from my body, but all will be well! Thank you, Lord, that you are in control! I thank you for loving me and holding me. I also thank you for the struggles and trails that bring me closer to you. I love living in your light and love!

All will be well!! I can say that with complete cofidence! All will be well!! Praise your holy name!

Cry Out To Jesus!

Oh, how I wish I had a Bible here to pour through. I desperately want to search through scripture to settle all of the selfishness that I have pulsing through my veins. My bil has a wonderful work opportunity that will take him and his family to Amarillo. Amarillo? I should be so excited because it is still in Texas. However, I have gotten so use to the idea of them just being down the road in Fort Worth. Oh, I am so selfish! I am so disappointed in the way I have allowed selfishness to overtake my joy. Also, my husband is starting a job tonight that will keep him away 6 night a week. Talk about selfishness. I am sick because I am so selfish and want him at home. I am sick at the way I am behaving. Pathetic actually. Oh, how I wish I had scripture to pour through.

As far as baby Nabors, I am 12 days past ovulation. Which means that I will know this weekend if this month was a success or a bust. My body & my crazy emotions are telling me that it was another bust. I know God's timing is ALWAYS right. However, have I mentioned that I am so selfish, and I want things the way I want them?

Oh, Sweet Jesus, I cry out to you. I beg that you take this selfish monster away and replace it with joy and compassion for the feelings and desires of those around me. I worry way too much about how I am affected instead of looking at how others are. I love you, Lord! I need only You! I need only YOU!!! Oh, how I love you so!!!

Our World Is About To Change

Holy & Most Precious Father,
I lift up our life to you. I am so thankful that you have blessed us with a home that has plenty of space. I thank you for bringing my sister, and her family home to Texas. Jason and I looking so forward to having them there with us. I pray a blessing over our home that it may be a place that totally glorifies you and allows us the chance to show your goodness, mercy, grace and love. Father, I lift up my home to you. I ask that you be in complete control of all the words spoken there and actions there. Thank you, Lord for being faithful! AMEN!

I am too excited! My sister, Amy, her husband, RW, and their two children, Tucker - 2 and Tanner -2months are on their way to our home. They have decided that it is time to move back to Texas. Our family is beyond excited. All of us want to wrap our arms around them and welcome them home!

"Though it tarries, wait for it; For it will certainly come, it will not delay." Habakkuk 2:3

Oh, how I get caught up in the longing. I have been deep in scriptures today desperately searching for answers to different things Jason and I have talked about trying in order that we have a baby.

In the Romans 14:5 it states" One person reguards one day above another, another reguards every day alike. Each person must be fully convinced in his own mind." This means that you must make up your mind and figure out your own convictions. I know without a shadow of a doubt certain things that I do not want to do in order to become pregnant. However, I do not feel a conviction about others. I am truly searching today.

One thing I did find that makes me smile. Women in the bible who were barren and had their womb opened had children that did amazing things for God. Elizabeth had John the Baptist. Hannah had Samuel. Jason and I are both in prayer that when this time of wait is over, we will be blessed with a child that will bring great joy to God and be an amazing asset to His kingdom.

My Precious Husband

I just got one of the most amazing emails ever. Jason wrote the following, "Thank you. Thanks for being loyal, faithful and loving. You are a jewel in my crown. You are my treasure stored up in heaven that I have received early and forever."

I am constantly impressed by his love for our Father. We had an amazing service yesterday at church. Jason left knowing we had some hard changes to make in our world. He was sure that we needed to rid our home of anything that would cause us to stumble or cause anyone else to question our faith and love for Jesus Christ.

I have to admit. It was hard to say ok to some of his decisions, but I can see God working through him. I know one day we will stand much stronger and healthier than we are today, and we will look back and be amazed at the areas where God's hand blessed Jason's faithfulness in our home.

I am so thankful that he is mine.