A Big Deal

J. and I just had one of the best talks of our marriage after watching the season finale of....



hold on to your hats...



Bret Michael's Rock of Love! Yes, Bret gave J. and I subject to apply to our marriage. Now, let me just say...I had to come blog about my revelation while my husband went straight to snoring. However, I have truly had a revelation.

Seriously!

And no, my revelation wasn't that I want to bring big, rocker hair back...because believe me...I could NEVER do the bangs the way my sister could do the bangs...you rocked the bangs, sister!!!

... it was a finalization that I want to make a big deal of my husband. Let me explain. We were getting ready for bed, and I mentioned that I liked how Bret (AKA VH1) made a big deal out of the dates with the girls. I was trying to let J. know that every little girl grows up with the dream of being the big deal. When it hit me that is why I LOVE birthdays, holidays, fancy events, friend gatherings, being with my family...etc...it is a chance to feel like a big deal. It also hit me that I made a big deal out of J. when we were dating, but since we have gotten married, I have been waiting for him to make a big deal out of me.

HOW SELFISH AM I?

Here I am supposed to be this man's best friend, and all I am worried about is me! Seriously, I wouldn't treat any of my family or friends like that. Why did I do that to him? I would bend over backwards without wanting anything in return for my sister, brother, friends, etc....

but this man....

the one who stood with me and vowed to walk through this life with me . . .

this precious soul has not had that side of me. He hasn't had the chance to be made a big deal. His sweet grandmother who passed away when he was a young boy, truly was the last person on this earth to make him feel special.


Needless to say, I am on a mission. My life mission has been expanded for one more person. My dear husband's birthday is two days before mine. I have joked with him that he needed to pick another month to celebrate his birthday. Yes, I am hanging my head in shame. However, this year, I want to make his day precious to him. I searching for the best German Chocolate Cake recipe. How I wish I could talk to his grandmother and get it from her!

Please pray for me. Pray that this revelation doesn't have selfish motives at all. Pray that I will seriously accept the commissioning of making my husband feel like a big deal.

Adoption Update

We have lost the birthmom. She won't even return our friend's phone calls. If you would like to know more about why that is, just ask. I seriously don't mind talking about it. J. and I are thrilled that God used us to sit down and talk to this precious woman. We are blessed that we got a chance to tell her how much God loves her, and that there is no disgrace in carrying a life. She had been told many times how awful the pregancy was by the people she surrounded herself with.

So, we are looking for a new birthmom. We are going to go through an agency. We have a few more phone calls to make on Monday and Tuesday to finalize who we are going to use. This means that we will have a much bigger expense with this adoption, but we have a HUGE hurdle behind us. We got our homestudy and background check done. We are going to try to apply for some grants. We don't think we will be granted any loans, but God is bigger than our credit issues. So, we will see.

Anyway, keep us and our future child in your prayers. We are so excited to be matched and bring him or her home.

The True Meaning of Fall

Fall officially began at our house this weekend. A cinnamon sent is filling the air as we speak (yes we coordinate our house hold sents with the seasons). One of my little quirks I suppose!

The other reason Fall has begun at our house is because Aggie football begins today. Now, if you are not an Aggie, you might think I am crazy. BUT I have to say that I just watched this for the first time with tears streaming down my face!